Let’s Start Talking Again

We, as a society, really have no idea how suffocated people are in their emotions. Most people have nobody to express themselves entirely to. Everyone is holding back their vulnerabilities to maintain the social image of a confident and happy person.Heart-to-heart conversations have become rare, artificial and shallow. Most hearts are filled with empty defences.Most people can’t even talk to their life-partners openly for the fear of being judged or rejected. Emotions await just a release. Social images make sure that weakness is not glorified. Children have bottled up stress. Young people suffer from anxiety and depression. It is just lack of social support. It is lack of non-judgmental friendships. It is a result of fast and busy lives. where nobody has time to just sit and watch someone cry. It is a result of instant and impatient lifestyle practices, that emotions have started feeling like a waste of time.

We have Whats App, Facetime and social media – and we also have stress, anxiety and depression.Our forefathers had neither…. Because they talked to each other…… Because talking helps…..The face-to-face type talking, the just-listen-to-me. type talking, the hold-my-hand-and-let-me-cry type talking, the sit-next-to-me-and-listen-to-my-silence type talking… the talking where persons can be themselves and say anything they feel without the fear of any judgement or loss or rejection.Today, we don’t like that type of talking! In fact we avoid people. Naturally, it has led to mental illnesses….which are becoming an epidemic.There is not much we can do but we can offer listening. Let’s let people talk without any fear. Let’s create conversations.

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How can I improve myself within a month?

1. Detoxify your speech. Reduce the use of cuss words. Be polite. 2. Read everyday. Doesn’t matter what. Choose whatever interests you. 3. Promise yourself that you will never talk rudely to your parents. They never deserve it. 4. Observe people around you. Imbibe their virtues. 5. Spend some time with nature everyday. 6. Feed the stray animals. Yes, it feels good to feed the hungry. 7. No ego. No ego. No ego. Just learn, learn and learn. 8. Do not hesitate to clarify a doubt. “He who asks a question remains fool for 5 minutes. He who does not ask remains a fool forever”. 9. Whatever you do, do it with full involvement. That’s meditation. 10. Keep distance from people who give you negative vibes but never hold grudges. 11. Stop comparing yourself with others. If you won’t stop, you will never know your own potential. 12. The biggest failure in life is the failure to try”. Allways remember this. 13. I cried as I had no shoes until I saw a man who had no feet”. Never complain. 14. Plan your day. It will take a few minutes but will save your days. 15. Everyday, for a few minutes, sit in silence. I mean sit with yourself. Just yourself. Magic will flow. 16. In a healthy body resides a healthy mind. Do not litter it with junk. 17. For one month, eat home cooked meals. 18. Keep your body hydrated at all times. Practice drinking 8–10 glasses of water. 19. Make a habit to eat at least one serving of raw vegetable salad on a daily basis. 20. Take care of your health. “He who has health has hope and he who has hope has everything”. 21. Life is short. Life is simple. Do not complicate it. Don’t forget to smile..

Friendship

Mathematician Ramanujam didn’t have any close friends and someone asked him the reason. He replied that although he wanted to have close friends but nobody was up to his expectations.

When asked how he expected his friend to be, he replied, “like numbers 220 and 284!”The person got confused and asked what is the connection between friendship and these numbers!

Ramanujam asked him to find the divisors of each number! With much difficulty, the person derived and listed them as, 220 → 1, 2, 4, 5, 10, 11, 20, 22, 44, 55, 110, 220284 →1, 2, 4, 71, 142, 284Ramanujam then asked the person to exclude the numbers 220 and 284 and asked the sum of the remaining divisors.The person was astonished to find,220 → 1+2+4+5+10+11+20+22+44+55+110=284284 →1+2+4+71+142=220

Ramanujam explained that an ideal friendship should be like these numbers, to complement each other. Even when one is absent, the other should represent the friend!

Hats off to this great mind and genius who is on the world’s top list of mathematicians!

 

 

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Do You Know Your Dog Actually Helps You Live Longer — Health & Beauty

Dogs are none less than a blessing. Statistics have shown that people who own Fido probably live longer than people who don’t. Dogs build an emotional connection with their parents in no time that helps in reducing emotional and mental health issues. While on the other hand, owning these creatures bring a complete change in…

via Do You Know Your Dog Actually Helps You Live Longer — Health & Beauty

Words by Andy Rooney

This quote is profound: If you will take the time to read I promise you’ll walk away with an enlightened perspective. The subjects covered affect us all, on a daily basis:

I’ve learned …That the best classroom in the world is at the feet of an elderly person.

I’ve learned …. That when you’re in love, it shows.

I’ve learned …. That just one person saying to me, ‘You’ve made my day!’ makes my day.

I’ve learned …. That having a child fall asleep in your arms is one of the most peaceful feelings in the world.

I’ve learned …. That being kind is more important than being right.

I’ve learned …. That you should never say no to a gift from a child.

I’ve learned …. That I can always pray for someone when I don’t have the strength to help him in some other way.

I’ve learned …. That no matter how serious your life requires you to be, everyone needs a friend to act goofy with.

I’ve learned …. That sometimes all a person needs is a hand to hold and a heart to understand.

I’ve learned …. That simple walks with my father around the block on summer nights when I was a child did wonders for me as an adult.

I’ve learned …. That life is like a roll of toilet paper. The closer it gets to the end, the faster it goes.

I’ve learned …. That we should be glad God doesn’t give us everything we ask for.

I’ve learned …. That money doesn’t buy class.

I’ve learned …. That it’s those small daily happenings that make life so spectacular.

I’ve learned …. That under everyone’s hard shell is someone who wants to be appreciated and loved.

I’ve learned …. That to ignore the facts does not change the facts.

I’ve learned …. That love, not time, heals all wounds.

I’ve learned …. That no one is perfect until you fall in love with them.

I’ve learned … That life is tough, but I’m tougher.

I’ve learned …. That opportunities are never lost; someone will take the ones you miss.

I’ve learned …. That when you harbor bitterness, happiness will dock elsewhere.

I’ve learned …. That I wish I could have told my Mom that I love her one more time before she passed away.

I’ve learned …. That one should keep his words both soft and tender, because tomorrow he may have to eat them.

I’ve learned ….. That a smile is an inexpensive way to improve your looks.

I’ve learned ….. That when your newly born grandchild holds your little finger in his little fist, that you’re hooked for life.

I’ve learned …. That everyone wants to live on top of the mountain, but all the happiness and growth occurs while you’re climbing

Pain and cure

Types Of Pain That Are Directly Linked To The Emotional States

DIS-EASE (I AM NOT AT EASE) is just an emotional state of mind.

Chronic pain is not only caused by physical injury, but also caused by stress and emotional issues.

Let’s take a look at what pain in a particular area of your body indicates and how to self heal ourselves:

Head

Headaches (little or chronic) can be caused by invalidating the self.Self-criticism. Fear.

Self-Heal : Do left nostril breathing (Chandra nadi).

Inhale-Exhale through left nostril 2 sets of 10 counts twice a day.

Neck

Neck pain represents inflexibility & stubbornness.

Self-Heal : Rotate the neck clock – anticlockwise 50 times.

Shoulders

Pain in the shoulders indicate that the person carries a heavy emotional burden. Shoulders carry everything.

Self-Heal : Rotate the shoulders clock-anticlockwise for 50 times.

Upper Back

Upper back pain manifests lack of emotional support. Holding back feelings or doesn’t feel appreciated or loved.

Self-Heal : Place the hand in Namaste position in the centre of the chest, thumbs touching the chest. Apply pressure with the thumbs to the chest and exhale through the mouth.Do it 20 times.

Lower Back

Pain in the lower back indicates fear of money, lack of financial support.

Self-Heal : Do visualisation meditation (imagine yourself) counting a bundle of notes. Do it daily.(Fake it till you make it).

Elbows

Elbows and arms signify a lack of capacity & ability to hold the experiences of life. Resisting change of directions and acceptance.

Self-Heal : Just wrap your hands around yourself as if hugging your own self and say this to yourself..

“I trust, love, accept, approve and forgive myself.” As many times as possible everyday.

Hands

Pain in the hands may be caused by all ways of dealing with hold & handle, clutch & grip, grasping & letting go.

Self-Heal : Hold a pen/pencil tightly in your hand (image that the object (pen/pencil) is the xyz situation of ones life) then when ready to “Release” the situation just throw the pen/pencil with full force & free yourself.

Abdomen

Undigested thoughts.

Self-Heal : Place your hands on the belly button(navel) & do 4-4-4-4 count breathing.

4 count Inhale

4 count Hold

4 count Exhale

4 count Hold.

Do it as long as comfortable.

Hips

Major thrust in moving forward.

Self-Heal : Sit on the floor placing the legs straight try walking lifting the hips.Walk 25 steps forward & 25 steps backwards.

Knees

Pain in the knee is a sign of pride & ego.

Self-Heal : Lie down on the floor, place the left ankle over the right knee & move the right knee up & down for 5 minutes. Then do the same with right ankle placing it above the left knee for 5 minutes.

Calves

Calf pain is caused by stress, emotional tension.

Self-Heal : Press the tender point 20 times located exactly in the centre of the calf(behind). Twice daily.

Ankles

Pain in ankles mean lack of ability to receive pleasure.

Self-Heal : Lie down on the floor, legs slightly apart & rotate the ankles clock-anticlockwise 50 times.

Feet

Feet pain represnts our lack of ability to understandable one self, life or others.

Self-Heal : Take a tennis ball & place it under the feet & roll on it. Can do it while sitting or standing.

Do these exercises & observe self.. Lets help the body heal itself automatically.

90% SICKNESSES are PHYSCOSOMATIC.

Unknown

Address the real issues

The Ministry of Health must immediately retract and correct the misinformed infographic on depression, says Smita Sahay

The Health Ministry’s ‘To Cope with Depression’ infographic is misinformed and erroneous on so many levels that instead of actually helping survivors or their caregivers with information, it reinforces the very stigma and stereotypes that so many mental health professionals and organisations are working very hard to address.

The text on the said poster claims, ‘To cope with depression

•  follow a routine

•  travel

•  be creative

•  take multivitamins

•  think positive

•  practice yoga

•  stay clean

•  sleep for minimum eight hours

•  eat fruits

•  go for walks

Great wellness advice. But that is the thing—this is ‘wellness’ advice, not treatment advice. One could arguably reuse the same poster for all kinds of wellness advice. And that is not the worst problem with the message. The bigger problem is that every single one of the ten pieces of advice is exactly what people battling depression find most daunting. Would the Ministry advise flu patients to ‘drop their body temperatures’ in order to ‘cope with influenza’?

There are many places one could read the definition of depression, such as, the World Health Organization website, the International Classification of Diseases Handbook 10 and the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders Fifth Edition.

Easier still, one could Google or Bing ‘symptoms of depression’ and learn a lot about this disease which is one of the leading causes of disability and mortality. Through this search one would even stumble upon WHO reports that claim that India is ‘the most depressed country’ in the world.

Let us put some of this information into perspective:

• Depression is NOT just an extended period of ‘low mood’. It is characterised by an unshakeable existential crisis and a complete lack of self-love.

• The word ‘depression’ represents a spectrum of depressive disorders that affect a large part of the population, across ages, socio-economic classes and locations.

• Depression CAN be diagnosed by several psychometric tests, physical examination and blood tests.

• Certain physical illnesses, such as a malfunctioning thyroid, low vitamin D or B12 levels, low magnesium levels and celiac disease CAN mimic or cause depressive disorders.

• Depressive disorders left untreated for long durations CAN cause or worsen physical illnesses, communicable and non-communicable, such as tuberculosis, cardio-vascular issues, type 2 diabetes and HIV.

• Low and middle income households in India ARE the worst affected.

• Depression IS the leading cause of suicides, ~1,35,000.

• People suffering from depression do NOT receive help because of stigma, lack of awareness and non-availability of health services.

When life seems meaningless and living is too much of an effort, how can one be expected to take their vitamins on time? Most depressive eating happens in binges of junk or not at all because of lost appetite; simply asking them to ‘eat fruits’ won’t work. When some of the most tell-tale signs of depression are insomnia or hypersomnia, what can advice to ‘sleep eight hours’ achieve?

An effective way to address depression is through a combination of three kinds of efforts in tandem: (i) drugs administered responsibly by a registered psychiatrist, (ii) psychotherapy with a licensed psychologist and (iii) self-care that includes exercise, mental health hygiene routine and good nutrition, in short, the advice on the poster. Take any of these three pillars away and the mental health plan will collapse. The Ministry has, for reasons best known to them, left out two extremely crucial elements of a complete mental health plan—the psychiatrists’ drugs and the psychologists’ therapy, and failed to label the infographic as ‘Self-care to Cope with Depression’.

Of course, self-care in generous doses along with therapy and, if needed, drugs, will catalyse recovery and management of depressive disorders wonderfully. Cases of mild clinical depression might even get addressed through self-care only, but in cases of moderate and severe clinical depression, when co-morbidity, risk of addiction, dysfunctionality and suicide risk are darkly significant, only self-care will achieve nothing for two reasons: (i.) the motivation and ability to undertake self-care is near zero in the patient, and (ii.) even in theory, mere self-care will not help with either the chemical imbalance in the brain and nervous system, nor with the downward spiral of darkness that depressed thoughts are.

The Health Ministry’s role must be to address real issues such as extremely poor psychiatrist-patient ratio through increased number of psychiatry seats in medical colleges, systematic licensing of psychotherapists, and multiple programs to spread mass awareness about mental health issues. In partnership with the Ministry of Culture and NGOs such as the Mental Health Foundation of India, the Health Ministry must also work on bringing about cultural change through the use of responsible language and addressing the shame and stigma that depression brings to patients. The Ministry must correct this irresponsibly tweeted infographic and must come down hard on individuals and organisations that spread misinformation on the spectrum of diseases as misunderstood as depression that hurts and kills millions of people.

Smita Sahay is Founder of the Calm Space Support Group Program.